Shake Your Booty
It's long been theorized that men are the "hunter/gatherers" while women take on the nuturer/caregiver roles in society. Neanderthal gender roles. Basic instinct. Genetic predisposition. blah blah.
But right in the face of all of that academic and historic dribble, I beg to differ. In fact, I've got scientifically solid (albeit anecdotal) evidence to the contrary.
You see, women, not men, search out their prized possessions like prey, exploring possibilities from store to store/catalogue to catalogue/web site to web site in a provocative and ruthless way, exercising all means of savvy and ploy in order to secure the very best for themselves. We will research, browse, gossip and supershop for an object with the scrutiny and tenacity of the fiercest lioness.
Then, we hold up this juicy prize for the entire pack to drool over before explaining--quite reflexively--that we were able to conquer the much desired, tenderest of beast for a mere drip of blood (i.e. ten bucks! on clearance!).
Anyone who has ever sat down to a table full of women and witnessed the spontaneous mutual admiration exchanges over the new shirt/haircut/shoes, followed by the inevitable declaration of where/when/how much, knows exactly what I'm talking about.
It's known as the "Target. $12! Theory of Evolution."
Don't believe me? Test it out....pay a compliment...just one compliment...to a woman on something she's wearing/carrying/walking in, and I guarantee she will immediately respond by thanking you and providing exacting details about where she bought it, how much it cost and the circumstances under which she was able to achieve such foraging excellence.
This knee-jerk reaction no doubt has its roots in the modern woman's constant battle with feelings of worth and the guilt associated with spending money on something for herself, rather than on her offspring.
That's crap, of course. We are worth it.
And we shouldn't feel the need to apologize (or rationalize dollar for dollar) for it. But it's a defense mechanism that has nonetheless nestled its way into the very fabric of our lives.
We do hunt and gather, baby. Those male types got nothin' on us when there's a red dot sale at Loehmann's.
It's just that we simply have to find a way to stop ourselves from constantly rationalizing the booty.
Labels: difference between the sexes, shopping, women
posted by jsa at 4:11 PM
3 Comments:
OK, let me spin your analogy back on you. Let's look at the effort expended in relation to what you get out of it. The man (when left to his own solitary devices) walks into the mall, spends 6 minutes finding a perfectly suitable pair of jeans, walks out. Very little energy or time is wasted, because the man is more concerned with the functionality of his prey rather than the approval of "the pack". In an evolutionary sense, our single-mindedness is a virtue (at least in this case). We go, we get what we need, we get out. More free time for us.
The woman, on the other hand, spends 3 or 4 hours searching and getting distracted by a bunch of stuff she doesn't really need, when something perfectly suitable is likely within easy reach. This activity is often performed in the company of other women from "the pack," and on some level, I would guess the "group hunt" plays out as a competition to see who can make the best "killing" (and gain the ability to boast about how you did it, thus raising your status within the pack to some extent). But in the end, what ultimate purpose does all this serve, other than requiring you to find a nest with enough closet space for all your stuff? From where I'm sitting, that looks like a lot of time and energy wasted making a simple task way more complicated than it needs to be, all for a slight ego boost somewhere down the road.
Then again, I'm too busy lounging in front of the TV during all my free time to really think too much about it.
Ah, but your words give you away..."very little time wasted."
The 3 or 4 hours we spend isn't wasted. It's what we'd CHOOSE to do with our free time. It is the journey, as much as the destination, that we enjoy.
Touché. But repeating yourself three times? That's wasted time. ;)
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